Saturday, June 18, 2011

Can I Get a Break...Please?

Apparently I went to some crazy pregnant woman support group a couple years back and mistakenly raised my hand when asked who wanted to volunteer to take on the world's kidney stones for other people...while pregnant.  Yes, folks.  I am on my fourth kidney stone as we speak.  Kill me now.  Here is a little recap of my (now screwed) medical history when it comes to stones...

*July 2009 - 2 weeks before I give birth to Cole, I am struck with my very first kidney stone experience. After heading to the women's hospital in the middle of the night, thinking I must be in labor since I felt like I was going to die, they decided my excruciating pain must have something to do with Cole's position in-utero.  Lets just say this was a major joke.  People: if your child could ever get themselves into a position that causes you THAT much intense pain while pregnant, everyone would be only children with zero siblings.  Luckily I was able to see my doctor the following morning and through my hobbling & crazy appearance, my doctor decided we would treat the pain as a kidney stone.  A mere 24 hours after the intense pain began, it stopped suddenly and I passed the stone at home.  Success.  I gave birth to a weird, ugly, 6mm rock two weeks prior to giving birth to an incredibly cute kid...and yes, labor was a piece of cake compared to that nonsense.

*March 2010 - Fast forward a few months and BAM.  Don't you wish you got that CT scan after you had Cole, Amanda?  Uhhh yeah.  At the end of March, while staying with the in-laws in southern Indiana for the weekend, I woke up with the same CRAZY pain as before...except this time may have been a bit worse, if that is possible.  After an ER visit with a CT scan that showed not one, but two kidney stones (one on each side), I finally saw a Urologist.  He scheduled me for a lithotripsy two days from then and I took pain medication in the meantime.  The surgery (sans scalpels mind you) was just OK...was not a fan of going totally under...felt gross afterward...wasn't a huge fan of the stent they put in either, but the 7mm stone was gone.  Worst part was that I was nursing Cole and had to "pump & dump" for 24 hours due to the anesthesia they used during the procedure.  Naturally Cole rejected any hint of formula...although thinking back we should have tried chocolate milk, bahahaha.  He lived on water and baby food and was fine, though.  Although I wanted them to do a second lithotripsy as soon as possible for the stone on the other side, knowing we wanted our kids spaced fairly closely, they wanted to "wait and watch" blah blah blah.  So I said "oh well."

*April 2011 - Yup, another one.  My second one as a pregnant person, third one in general.  YAY!  I went to the Women's Hospital after the Percocet at home was not cutting it and got put on a morphine pump.  Over the course of my stay (a little over 24 hours) they changed my morphine pump roughly 4 times.  Boy was that an experience.  Anyway, that evening I passed my third kidney stone...6mm...the nurses were cheering and my nurse was showing off the stone to practically anyone who passed by the nurses station.  Instant celebrity?  Oh yes.

And so here we are, June 2011...nearly 2 years from when I had my very first kidney stone episode, experiencing the wonder and magic that IS passing a kidney stone...for the fourth time.  I feel like instead of giving birth to my second child in a couple weeks, it will actually be my sixth.  Ahhhhhh.

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